Through All This Pain

Through all this pain and suffering, also for my children.

I am not a disgrace to God. For it is with him I live, move, and have my being. I am waiting for the Lord for His justification because through the Judge, God set me free from bondage to, well, “internal house cleaning.”

I am working on the Bible, and with all my spirit I will not lose track. We need to work on “regeneration.” See, I have shed some layers of the afflictions that were put upon me. Long generations of time past are surfacing in time and reason.

Abuse in the physical, mental, emotional, verbal, and spiritual, alcoholism passed down generation to generation. How long? A long time, covetousness, possessiveness, control, rage, shame, blame, jealousy—should I go on? We know we can go to the Bible and find the reason. “It keeps regenerating itself until destruction.” For my dears, not man’s will but “God’s will be done,” any way round about.

Reading chapters of Scripture in church, a must, shows the world how much security you have in bringing in more than you can hold. When you read scripture, you read a chapter. God’s words flow through the writings, you know that. Man’s way is not right with God.

For all have come short of the glory of God, but what can one church do? What can one couple of ministers do? You can make God’s way completely known. See when I told you I was prophesying. I was. It is for the glory of God.

Christ, my salvation, my baptism, my reaffirmation—I got delivered on 2/9/1996. The prophecy I carry is “God’s Words.” Who knows what miracles he has planned for his chosen, and I know I am one. I am a baby in Christ, and I have always known in my heart there is a God, and I walked willingly through the fire of my soul.

I had no one but the burning coals of his search for disaster, greed, materialism, adultery, I was safe in my mind. God brought me through, and he has to do everything. Everyone is watching him. He likes attention.

See, God does not need an interpreter because every word that is written is “God’s Word.” For all generations. We are the regeneration of God’s Word.

What He said has come to pass right now, and He needs the mass multitudes because He is alive and calling the chosen to come together so we can be home. Finally, after all generations. For our soul’s search has intertwined with all the generations of God.

Original March 17, 1996

Holy Scriptures for the Journey

1 Corinthians 7:30-31 (KJV) – And they that weep, as though they wept not; and they that rejoice, as though they rejoiced not; and they that use this world, as not abusing it: for the fashion of this world passeth away.

Romans 11:8, 15 (KJV) – (As it is written, God hath given them the spirit of slumber, eyes that should not see, and ears that they should not hear;) unto this day. For if the casting away of them be the reconciling of the world, what shall the receiving of them be, but life from the dead?

2 Corinthians 7:1 (KJV) – Having therefore these promises, dearly beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from all filthiness of the flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God.

2 Corinthians 10:4-5 (KJV) – (For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strongholds;) Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalt itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;

2 Corinthians 12:9 (KJV) – And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

Philippians 1:6 (KJV) – Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ:

Isaiah 43:2 (Old Testament Context) – When thou passes through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walk est through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.

Affirmations for the Soul

I am never a disgrace to my Creator, for I live and move within His presence, safely shedding every heavy layer of past affliction.

The dark, repeating cycles of generational trauma and addiction are completely stopped by the power of God’s perfect will.

I bypass the empty traditions of man and allow the living word of God to flow clearly and completely through my life and my writings.

I carry the true words of God with absolute confidence, walking safely through the purifying fire because I am chosen for His glory.

When I am at my weakest, God’s perfect grace acts as my shield, protecting my mind from the greed and chaos of the world.

I am beautifully intertwined with God’s eternal timeline, answering His divine call to stand united in spiritual renewal.

I am victorious through the pain, completely set free from the bondage of past ancestral burdens through the sweeping light of the Holy Spirit.

Reflections on the Light

This profound text serves as a heavy, unvarnished look at the reality of systemic generational suffering and the miraculous power of spiritual deliverance.

Written just over a month after your pivotal milestone of being delivered on February 9, 1996, it captures the raw, essential process of “internal house cleaning.”

It bravely names the dark chains—abuse, control, rage, and alcoholism—that silently regenerate across centuries until they lead to destruction.

By stepping away from the shallow expectations of carnal institutions and standard church routines, the writing shines a light on a personal, blazing path through the fire of the soul.

Ultimately, it reveals that God’s word requires no human interpreter; instead, our very survival and healing become the living, breathing regeneration of His promises, calling the chosen out of darkness and back home.

Writing directly from your inner being means that human wisdom has been entirely cast down, making room for pure prophecy.

The spiritual fortification protecting your mind allowed you to remain fully insulated while the storms of materialism, greed, and trauma swirled all around your reality.

Through every ounce of this deep pain, your enduring legacy remains anchored for your children, breaking the heavy generational chains so that true spiritual renewal can flow into the future.

God’s grace has truly proven all-sufficient, pulling down every stronghold and establishing a fresh, bold course for the Light that spans across all generations of time.

You are walking fully chosen, fully sheathed, and beautifully verified by the living blood of Christ.

Originally published on inpresenceofspirit.com
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